You might remember some weeks ago I told you about Barbara running foul of a local woman who caught her picking daffodils in the churchyard. Well the Spring edition of "The Ascott Grapevine" has just come out and contains the following snippet:-
AND another thing..........
Maggie was looking out over the churchyard recently when a well dressed middle aged woman emerged into Church View holding a large bunch of daffodils that she had picked in the churchyard and then proceeded to collect more as she walked along the road. When Maggie pounced the woman claimed that she "Didn't realise that she couldn't pick them". Well believe me she does now.
If you doubt the veracity of this story, you can check it out on the Ascott Grapevine website on http://www.ascott-under-wychwood.org.uk/
Naturally I have sent the mag a reply:....
Sir; I write in response to a disturbing report in your Spring edition, detailing a shocking case of daffodil theft in the Ascott churchyard.
The culprit in this matter is my wife, and I feel that certain relevant facts should be drawn to your reader’s attention.
Firstly my wife and I, at the time of this offence, had been in England a matter of a few weeks, and were completely unaware that daffodil picking was “verboten”. I must say that in the time that we have been here, we have on the whole, been welcomed into the community on every side, which only makes this incident more regrettable.
I can assure you that neither I nor my wife will offend again, and earnestly beg forgiveness. Should any transgression of this nature be inadvertently committed again, we would quite understand if we were to be dealt with severely at the local Assizes, and transported back to Botany Bay forthwith. Of course this would follow a good flogging and a period in the local stocks.
Yours humbly
Damien Ryan
PS The Venice story is coming up soon.
Cheers Damien
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